A Cool Thing

I Never No What to Write so I Say the Same Shit

2008-02-08T11:59:00.000-08:00

How do I obtain this certain status that in my mind seems valuable/desirable to have.

It's a race, beauty contest for people that in most cases care little to 0 about you. They pass quick judgement whether you deserve this valued, desired status and that is it. People are always asking what can this person do for me. Corporate America has become social america, as people quickly ask that question. (What can they do for me?) I'm guilty of it. Work to worker. Worker to work. Teacher to student. Student to teacher. Worker to worker. Work to work. People to people. Peer to peer. Friend to friend. Stranger to stranger. Child to Child. Parent to child? Probably.

Let's just be happy and give kisses. Hugs. Smiles. High Fives (Not a big fan). Whatever it may be. Don't make shit so busy. Make it relaxed. ENJOY something. Enjoy... people, family, friends brothers, sisters, parents, strangers, people you kind of know, animals, trees, leaves, music, EVERYTHING.

I was thinking of another idea when i started writing, but ideas evolve. Peace, Love, and Crabs.

take this sinking boat, raise your hopeful voice

2008-01-03T23:24:00.000-08:00

i'm glad that no one reads this because at 225 i can write as a please and know that few to 0 will read.

i'm fairly drunk and am watching a movie wishing i could live a lifestyle that seems foreign to me. i'm not sure why, i and have never understood why it seems appealing to me.

life can be a maze and has continually provided me with dead ends as well as prizes at the middle of the maze. it interesting that there are dead ends as well as a finish to mazes as life as a maze seems to be contintual. Yes. it has many dead ends but there isn't a finish. if continues until you die and someone else picks up where you left off.

i'm positive this seems typical. for the most part i think it is typical. i'm fairly typical, but life as a whole is not typical for anyone. every person has different things that they focus on, different things that they feel are more important than others.

i'm wishy washy, not sure what the hell i want. thats fine, most don't know what they want, but most don't use it as an excuse for the way they act and think. everyone has been through something that has tried them. difficult relationship, family situation, death, whatever. my life has been easy but for some reason i'm still sorting stuff out. i'm not sure what i want. interesting. not really.

So It Goes

2007-07-30T13:51:00.000-07:00

"The guide invited the crowd to imagine that they were looking across a desert at a mountain range on a day that was twinkling bright and clear. They could look at a peak or a bird or a cloud, at a stone right in front of them, or even down into a canyon behind them. But among them was this poor Earthling, and his head was encased in a steel sphere which he could never take off. There was only one eyehole through which he could look, and welded to that eyehole were six feet of pipe.
This was only the beginning of Billy's miseries in the metaphor" (in life). "He was also strapped to a steel lattice which was bolted to a flatcar on rails, and there was no way he could turn his head or touch the pipe. The far end of the pipe rested on a bi-pod which was also bolted to the flatcar. All Billy could see was the little dot at the end of the pipe. He didn't know he was on a flatcar, didn't even know there was anything peculiar about the situation.
The flatcar sometimes crept, sometimes went extremely fast, often stopped - went uphill, downhill, around curves, along straightaways. Whatever poor Billy saw through the pipe he had no choice but to say to himself, 'That's life.' "

Oh life. Oh Kurt. Way to go buddy. Way to go. Shackles. Confinement. I can't find my cool poem about confinement. I'd put it here if i had it.

I Never Know What to Put Here

2007-07-16T12:46:00.000-07:00

So I'm having a good monday, and a good start to summer B. Our internet stopped working so i have to sneak on and do stuff in labs. Hopefully it will be fixed tomorrow when Mr. Time Warner comes to help. Oh the man with the rusty paint can.

Maybe we should all give up, it's hard to stay motivated. So small oh so small. I know its got to be hard for Mr. Time Warner. Being motivated that is. He has to deal with people who are unsatisfied all day. I feel like that sometimes, but I can't imagine dealing w/ unsatisfied people 5 or 6 days a week from 9 to 5. Yuck. I'm unsatisfied now though.

I feel like I should be able to write something really really enlightening all the time, but I don't think I'm capable. I wrote these really cool poems with cool symbolism and everything. I read them in class and everyone just stared at me. No nothing, no reaction. I thought they were good. In reality I sounded like a five year old trying to read a picture he colored. So I'm not good with grammar, they say try writing poems. I said how bout I color this Ninja Turtles picture. I'm good with Ninja Turtles. Or at least I used to be when I was little.

6th Avenue Heartache

2007-07-15T19:48:00.000-07:00

I decided it'd be cool if I started posting again. I think it's a good idea and a wonderful outlet for bullshit that goes through my head on a regular basis.

I have a difficult time justifying anything I do. For what reason do I make this decision? Or choose to say this at this time. Most of the time I feel like the decision or the choice could have been any number of things and been fine, and also could be a number of bad things and been terrible. Things seem to be working for me recently, but I still question why I choose to do and say the things I do and act the way I do. Even if you feel like I make the best possible decision I could have made I think that there is a better alternative.

I would like to get back to basic things. I feel like there is so much waste and waste and can/will it ever stop? I have a hard time expressing myself, and I think that even this writing in code/symbols whatever it may be because I can't make sense of it myself. What i can provide is a way for me to think about things in my head and not internalize it, but feel like those scrambled thoughts are going toward something that is not myself.

My friends are all great people and this weekend it was re-painted in my head. Everyone I call a friend is a really great person, and I more than appreciate them. I've been fortunate to have people in my life that can have an effect. Family is the same way. I wish a family meant a family to everyone because if it did this world would be a lot better place for everyone.

Futbol
the world is our soccer ball
we'll kick it 'til it pops
and pop it will
we all ready broke the pump
what? you broke the pump?
hell yeah, i love to break things
what else have you broken?
my will, my mind, my heart
i'm in repair
i have a sub that fills in for me
they look like me
i'm going to fix the pump
the ball has deflated

I said good day.

Woot.

2006-11-13T10:20:00.000-08:00

So I'm sitting here during my seemingly stressful exams week not too stressed at all. I mean whatever happens happens because grades are grades and thats all. I'm going to do my best, but if its not that good then its not that good. Regardless of if they're good or not I did my best.

I'm singing Whitesnake Here I Go Again as I'm writing the Language paper and i feel like its going to have a pretty positive effect on it. "Like a drifter I was born to walk alone" - that should be my new motto. Just kidding, but seriously. I'm excited for the next few weeks and what they will bring. Fun Fun Fun. Well I didn't really have anything to say. So i'll go.

wink wink

Time to Look At and Criticize yourself

2006-11-10T19:15:00.000-08:00

So i'm sitting at home on this lonely friday night. I planned on having plans but as many times before my big plans have seemed to have fallen apart. This first brought me some disappointment but really hasn't turned out to be all bad. I hear the music and loudness of parties and people hanging out and its nice to be away from it. Relaxing. It brings a sort of lonely feeling though. Not a bad lonely feeling a free type of lonely.

I've gotten a chance to sing, play around, and goof off without worrying about anything because I have the pad to myself. I have lots to do coming up within the next few days so maybe a night of relaxing is what i need.

College can really be a lonely place sometimes. You're away from everything you grew up around and the people you grew up around. Some people love being away because they love the different/new experience with new/different people. And don't get me wrong I do love that new/different experience but I miss the people that were always there. They still may be there, but its not the same. It won't ever be the same. This is a constant struggle, because you can never have something be the way it was before because I know I've changed, and everyone else has changed as well. This is my fourth year of school! I mean I'm old. But I still see college as this new and different experience. A new independence from everything that previously may have had effects on my life. You have a chance to completely change who you ever were. Just because you're surrounded w/ these new people that really know nothing about you. I'd like to think I stay true to myself, but I question that sometimes. It's easy to pick yourself apart, and I'm pretty good doing it. The thing is I don't want to change, I don't want to grow up. I don't want to have responsibilities, but maybe I do. Maybe I want this and maybe I want that. Can you really say they know what they want for sure. I know I want to end this blog. You make sense of it, I'm still trying.

Bye Bye.

Take me as I Am

2006-10-31T23:50:00.000-08:00

This is who I am and this is who I'll continue to be. I wish I could coincide with everyone and all, but this is who i'll continue to be. I hope you can deal. I contradict myself. I lie. I find it hard finding my true self, but i contine to search. I don't know what i'm talking about. I'm lost, but i'll keep searching. I know the truth, but for some reason I run from it. I'm fake. I'm a jerk. I'm full of pride. I have a hard time expressing myself sometimes. I'm wishy washy. I'm confused.

Despite all these things, a rock and stronghold is in my life. Despite all these things God blesses me with ideal people and ideal opportunities. I'm thankful for this. Regardless of how worldly I can be, I continue to be watched over and blessed. Jesus truly meets you through people. Even though a being may be a non-christian they are still used for God's glory. Weird.

Blah Blah. Make sense of non-sense.

title

2006-10-30T13:19:00.001-08:00

I fell off the wagon while it was moving. I was hurt so it took me a while to heal. After I healed I took of running and I finally have caught back up to the wagon. It was still moving, but luckily I'm really fast.

I'm writing a paper and this is obviously a form of procrastination. Lord knows I wouldn't be blogging if a didn't have a paper to write. School work is piling up and I'm ready for the end of the quarter. I will be busy busy these last couple weeks but this is week number 9 already I think. My classes suck and frankly i'm getting my butt kicked. I'll be brett though and keep on doing my best.

I've been feeling extremely uncreative lately. I like to think of myself as a witty man but its just not rolling for me. Once the boulder stops it's hard for me to get it rolling again. I don't want to injure myself to get it rolling, but to get the boulder rolling is 100% necessary. If that made sense to you.

I got to see my loving family this weekend they continue to all be awesome. I miss them a lot, and thats really the one thing I hate about going back to school. Break will be fun and i'll get my fill of them, and i'm sure i'll be ready to come back to school when that is all finished.

Writing papers is for the birds and so is school. I could honestly teach school right now. I mean I know it may not be beneficial to the kids, but i know that I would have fun. Oh by the way my paper is going to suck because I haven't read the book.

Thanks so much for caring. I'm gonna write it and then go have fun later bye to you.
BRETT

2006-10-30T13:19:00.000-08:00

Why HELLO

2006-10-13T10:19:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone, i love you. Not because I actually love you love you or am in love with you but because jesus said to love everyone.

I just finished the week from hell and all things considered i came out average. I didn't get beat down so badly that I am doomed for the quarter, but i got beat down enough. The man rocked me, but I have a plan to stick it to him. Things are going well. I've been busy busy, and I haven't been at Wright State on a weekend in about 4 weeks. Shortly i'm leaving for OU to see my friend adam. He's awesome and the weekend has plenty in store for us.

My roomate Matt sucks at Mario Cart 64 and i beat his rear on a regular basis. He thinks he's cool, and for the most part he is, but when i knock his ass around in cart it puts him in his place.

I'm missing lots of people and i hope everyone is doing well. If you read this i hope to see you sooner than later.

"All your ways, they fall on me.."

kisses

9/20

2006-09-20T16:28:00.000-07:00

You like that title? Very creative and somewhat on the clever side i'd have to say.

I'm loving the cooler weather. I like being able to wear long sleeves and be comfortable. Long sleeves are cool just you are.

So I got a parking ticket this past weekend during one of the many fun experiences I had. 100$! can you believe it. I'm not gonna pay i though. I don't believe in paying crap that is BS. And this is BS so therefore I will refuse to pay it. It'll be my little way of sticking it to the man.

I had fun time at Oasis last night. I met some people, and had some fun so props to that. I always have a good time there, and I think I will continue to attend on tuesdays.

Today has been spent being fairly unproductive. I basically sat around all day thinking and goofing. I played some tunes and sang. Fairly boring, I'm a boring guy though what can I say.

I missing a lot of people right now. I miss my family a ton. I will see them this weekend. Hooray. I miss all my people from home, and the people that have been my best friends for a long time. Hopefully I will be seeing them soon. I miss my camp peoples too, they're the people that showed me a new aspect of life and a new appreciation of people and how people can have fun together. I've always had a strong appreciation for friendships and what they can do and what they mean. I'm lucky to have those feeling about a number of people. New people and old people, but just to have a bunch of people that I really value feels good and its good to know that I always have somewhere to turn.

Thanks for the read.

Brett

Hmm

2006-09-15T15:25:00.000-07:00

Hey all.

God's grace and mercy are unfathomable. Regardless of how far off we are, or how worldly and stupid we can think sometimes, he still loves us and reaches for us (Meets us). Yeah LMC. This is in response to a recent post by the honorable Nathan Castorena. Every human sins, and it sometimes as a Christian it can be hard to come to this realization. Even when we're doing our best and never messing up we still sin, the simple fact that we're human messes everything up. Christians hold themselves to a higher standard because we say, sing, or do this - I know I have before. We can be in different places in regards to where we stand w/ God, but we're all on the same page when it comes to sinning. Right different people have different struggles but we're on the same page. Humbling yourself is very difficult coming from such a prideful sort of world, but its necessary and one of my constant, ongoing struggles. The great thing about this sin garbage is Jesus died for everyone so we may all have forgiveness. Jesus can take our struggles from us and help us through anytime in our lives. God loves you and he sent Jesus to die for you sins.

How about that for a sermon?

Not sure where it came from. Nathan's post got me thinking about salvation and how wonderful it is. I'll talk to you all soon.

Love.

New Year, New Deals

2006-09-12T10:01:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone, been a long long time. I've posted once between last school year and now and that was a week ago. I think i'll get back into the groove. I enjoy utilizing this as an outlet for whatever my mind may be going through.

School is going well, my class are all OK which is really the best they can be in my opinion. This year looks to bring some interesting opportunities and some new experiences. I have one old roomate and one new roomate. Things are going very well and I think this year looks to be a lot of fun. I've seen some people that i've missed and hopefully I will get to see much more of those people.

This past weekend I worked at LMC as a weekend host and it was awesome to see some people again. I worked w/ two of my favorite people. We had minimal responsibility compared to this past summer and it was just really a blast. LMC is a wonderful place with wonderful people.

The rain has put a damper on my class attendance today. I skipped my 8 30 which was pretty hardcore, and now i'm in contemplation of skipping my afternoon classes. I think i'll attend, but maybe the man will get to me and i'll stick it to him.

I miss my friends, and I hope to see them all very soon. Enjoyable experiences will be had.

Out for now.

Oh What to do.

2006-09-01T12:36:00.000-07:00

Its been forever. I move into school this weekend and i'm real excited. Things at home have kind of fizzled out and i haven't been real productive. Being at school will bring new experiences, and really a different sort of routine and lifestyle.

I spent the majority of my summer playing at Lutheran Memorial Camp. They paid me a little money too, but mostly i got so sing songs and play games. Two of my favorite things. I met a ton of people who have forever influenced my life. They've influenced my life by the way they treated me and they example they set through the lives they live. I love you guys.

I've spent some time w/ my home friends since i've been home and they are more than refreshing. Some things never change and the friendships I have and value with those fellows never seem to. I'm s0 thankful for them and the impact they've had on my life. They change, and I change but our friendships never seem to.

Pretty random, but i'm looking forward to school and seeing lots of awesome people that I have unfortunately neglected, not on purpose but it still has happened. Talk to everyone soon hopefully.

Shake and Bake,
Brett

So Yeah

2006-05-30T22:46:00.000-07:00

Hi to all. Its been a while once again.

I had a choir concert tonight and it was fun. I haven't sang since last spring quarter and it was fun once again. My mom, dad, and grandma came to the concert and we grabbed a bite to eat afterward. It was fun to see everyone again even though I had seen them yesterday and over the weekend.

I went home last weekend because it was really my last chance to go home for a while. I will be going directly to camp after my junior year schooling is over. I'm really looking forward to the opportunity but i'm feeling so rushed getting into it that i'm afraid enjoying the whole learning/beginning process will be difficult. I'm also feeling like i'm going to miss out on time with my friends at home. There will be some time in august that will be reserved for that sort of thing. My weekend was good. Friday when I got home I had over blake, brett, and ryan and we just sat around and did our normal boring thing. We went "lure" fishing because its really the only way to fish. I got to hang with my family this weekend a lot as well which was nice. Saturday blake and I went to Findlay with Brett. We met a few of his buddies and we had a fun time. Blake and I learned a thing about beverage choice. Brett was a wonderful host of sort and he was on top of his game. Sunday and Monday were spent with my family. We did various family things that we like to do. Overall it was a wonderful weekend. Now that I'm back at school i'm back to the grind and the million billion things i need to accomplish before the next few days. Things are looking up and although I'm somewhat stressed. On the everyone stress scale i'm not doing too bad. I have a tendancy to not care, or I guess just not allow things to effect the way I act or feel. I like it, but sometimes the man sticks me. I'm going to go for now. Plenty to do. Will I do it? That is the question, and only God knows that answer. If I had to guess I'd say no.

I love you

Brett

J. Alfred Prufrock

2006-05-24T20:40:00.000-07:00

Do I dare? Or do I continue this isolation and alienation. Not really, but at times. Its good to be by myself. I like to distance myself from people. The important people in my life are the ones i attempt to keep close. That doesn't always work. I try to be this available person that people love and love to be around. that doesn't always work. I like being myself. Sometimes I'm a social creature and sometimes I enjoy a distance from people. Enjoying isolation sometimes isn't my favorite thing in the world, because I don't want to be that guy. I like being available for people because I love people and love knowing and getting to know people. I like to invest my time wisely and the best way is to invest in a relationship. I can't always be available because my self won't allow myself. I don't feel regret, and I really wouldn't change a thing even if I could. Things are how they are, and things are what you make of them. Do I dare touch a settle universe? I think yes, I'll leave my mark on it. Whether that mark be good, or bad its my mark and its me being myself. Do I dare put myself to the side for others spiritual benefit? I hope. Do I dare? Because self is a big thing in this garbage called society. I would hope that I would be able to put that self aside; I would hope someone would be willing to do that for me. A crack of close lightning but no rain in sight. Do I dare upset this settled universe? I'm just one man with nothing to show for. I would hope that maybe once I can put is small footprint in the dust in this dusty dirty universe. Yeah it's dirty, but its lovely and the lovely makes me wonder how it got that way. Do people choose distance and through distance dare? No, they choose to be close in whatever way they dare. Dare to do what you love. Dare to unsettle this dirty, lovely universe. My ugly handprint with your ugly handprint will make a beautiful universe.

Out.

Brett

Wink

2006-05-21T18:28:00.000-07:00

So I have eluded my paper thats due wednesday this evening and this whole weekend really. I had an awesome weekend though so papers can wait.

Thursday I went to a small bar with one of my friends. It was a fun time and a cool place. It was empty and we basically had the whole place to ourselves. Friday I spent the whole day with myself. It was fun and relaxing. Saturday I basically did the same until the evening. I went to church at Apex, and then later I helped a friend move into his awesome apartment downtown. After checking out his sweet pad I went to a shindig in the highlands and saw many friends and met many cool people as well.

I have a big time paper aspirations for the next couple days, and hopefully I can make it home this weekend. I love you if you're taking time to read this.

It blows my mind when I do things like this. In a good way.

Brett

She Was a Good Dog, It Was Sad When I Had to Put Her Down

2006-05-20T12:15:00.000-07:00

I really have nothing to talk about. I just felt it necessary to tell people one thing because it's quite humbling.

I have virtually no money to my name. I've been scrounging up funds as much as possible, and conserving as much as well. Its difficult for me to budget, but when I have $0 it makes budgeting much easier.

Tonight I will be attending church, and going out and having fun.

Thinking of all the things that could have been or will eventually be. I'll do this later.

Brett

No Beat To Step To

2006-05-17T17:06:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time. I left myself with no beat to step to. Rain comes downs and washes my soul again.

Break-ups and all they entail are a weird thing. Love is a weird thing. It continually hurts but it leaves you with a sense of worth. Love can fill up a life quicker than any other worldly thing. Unless you have no soul breaking up with someone is a hard thing. Many times you want it but don't want to hurt the other person. You also want to look for your best interest as well. Ideally a relationship could end and neither party would be hurt, but i don't really think thats possible. If at some point you sincerely cared about that person it's impossible to not be hurt in someway. You prepare yourself for the break-up, but the preperation is really all for naught because you can't prepare for what you'll feel. Regardless of what you think you'll feel, you'll feel something different. In the end only you can determine what's best for you.

I've been out of a long relationship for a while now, and I still think about things. I'm glad I'm out of that relationship, and I hope she is as well. It's just that for so long you find yourself in this certain relationship that in a way defines you, and then all the sudden it's not there. You feel a sense of freedom as well as a sense of complete loss. The loss can be filled with more experience and time. I hate that I'm gereralizing this whole process, but I base things on my own limited experience.

Prayer and friends and family are keys to getting through these times. Pal, I love you. Jesus loves you too.

Out for now.

Brett

I'm Not Sure

2006-05-10T21:09:00.000-07:00

I just posted earlier today, but I feel the need to post again.

Why do things change? People and relationships mostly. Not in a bad way, but just different from how things were before. I'm in a funny place in that I don't want to live in the past and live from my past experiences but its hard not to. My past experiences and relationships have been awesome. I still have most of the same relationships but they are just different and evolved. We're different, changed people. Thus the changed relationships/friendships.

I don't want to say that my new "college" experiences have been a disappointment, because that is not the case whatsoever. Its just a different sort of experience. I enjoyed my high school friends and my friendships with them so much. They're still my favorite people, and I will more than likely be friends with all of them until I die. My college experience is still awesome, and its part of my maturation into adulthood. I guess its all part of growing up. Growing up is a weird sort of thing. I think i'll be growing up until I die. Sorry about this wicked blog.

Right Oh,

Brett

Its Not Safe to Set Her Free

2006-05-10T15:53:00.000-07:00

www.purevolume.com/adamwills

Hello all. The rains are peaceful and wonderful. Unless you are walking in it.

I am officially a counselor at Lutheran Memorial Camp for this summer. I heard today and it is wonderful information. I was super excited and anxious to hear what was going on with it. My references were taking longer than expected so the process was longer than expected. I look forward to an experience of a summer. Hopefully I won't miss out on too much fun at home. Some of the summer will be reserved for friends and family and the fun they entail.

Check out the site above and my favorite songs. I'm glad to say I've known Adam since we were show choir badasses, and he is a neat man with a neat sort of way about him. He's great, and I love him very much. Not in a gay sort of way though. Adam happy birthday darling, its your birthday. I will see you soon.

Thinking of world peace? Nah. But Maybe.

Brett

Are You in the Big Fish?

2006-05-07T23:07:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone, i'm feeling strange in a wonderful sort of way right now. I had a wonderful day where a did little to nothing, and it was wonderful. I read a lot and listened to music. I also did a touch of homework.

I'm not going to lie, the past few months have been quite a roller coaster. Big time highs as well as big time lows. Things have begun to flatten out and I like that. My whole life until these past few months have always been pretty steady. The highs and lows really seem to catch me off guard. All the highs have been followed by lows and the constant change has been stressful, and made me feel distant. I feel disconnected, and almost alienated from people because of how this roller coaster ride has gone. My reaction to the stress of the roller coaster seems to be isolation. I like to work things out myself, and sometimes wish I could better use people in my life to work things through.

I don't have an exact reason why these highs and lows have come, but I spiritually have not been well. The world has really taken me by the throat and force fed me its highs and lows. I haven't had the stability because I have gotten away from God and the stability that he offers me. It's humbling that no matter how many times I chose to run from what God has to offer he always continues to seek after me. Seems like things should be the other way around.

I had an interview on friday for a counselor position at Lutheran Memorial Camp, it went well and i'm really hoping for the position. It's a cool thing to think of a job that you recieve a benefit from, other than a financial benefit. It would be a position where I could influence someone as well as putting myself in a position to be influenced.

Hope things make sense. I'm scatterbrained as usual.

"It's be GRACE you've been saved through faith - and this not from yourself it's a gift of God."
(Ephesians)
God's abounding grace is unfathomable to me.
Brett

Chilling, Crying

2006-05-04T09:44:00.000-07:00

So I was sitting here thinking about how people are taking exams. Basically everyone is taking exams whether they're finals or midterms. Mine happen to be midterms which is totally depressing because I want to be on my summer break. It's ok though, it will be here before I know it and then fall will be here to soon to start the new school year.

So i'm banking on getting a job at this summer camp. I hopefully will be able to nail it down here shortly. Its important that i get the job because If i don't i'm screwed. I think everything will work out just fine though. As long as i get an interview, I will get the job. It will be fun, and a good experience. The only thing that will suck will be being away from home. Unlike many college students I really enjoy going home. Especially when i know i'm missing out on fun with my friends. I think this summer camp will be the best thing for me this summer.

So I have a test tomorrow which kind of sucks. I would love to go out and have fun tonight, which I may still do, but you gotta do what you gotta do. I'm really looking forward to getting together with my friends sooner than later. Its hard to focus on school when you're as scatterbrained as myself. I try to study but I find myself thinking about other things. Things that obviously weigh more than my school work does. My friends and family are definitely a tad above the whole schoolwork thing.

I'll go for now. School stuff can wait.

Out

Blogging

2006-05-02T17:51:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone, i haven't written in a while. And to myself I apologize. Not to any of you. Quit feeling sorry for yourself. I'm really talking to myself because I have few to none blog readers.

This week has been a busy one so far- paper, test, topic proposal, test. Kind of sucks but its really the first work I've had to to all quarter. I've been dominating it for the most part. I'm pretty smart I'm not gonna lie. I'm also pretty dumb though.

This weekend I went home to enjoy the company of my family and for my sisters confirmation. My brother was grounded because he's a compulsive liar so it was nice because I got to hang out with him as well. I watched my sister do her sports thing all day saturday, she had a track meet in the morning and some basketball games in the afternoon. It was fun hanging with the family. Sunday we had a big party at our house with both sides of my family which was also really fun to see everyone.

I'm really looking forward to this weekend being the single man that I am. I'm looking forward to having an exciting weekend and seeing a lot of cool people. This is short but I don't really have anything weighing heavily on my mind. The only thing weighing on my mind is that I love where I'm at right now in my life and I prefer nothing to change anytime soon.

Yeah peoples.
Brett

Annie Waits

2006-04-25T19:53:00.000-07:00

Two in a row yes that right. The clock never waits.

Today it rained all day and i'm not gonna lie, i enjoyed it thoroughly. I spent most of the day other than class inside and to myself. I accomplished some Jack Kerouac reading and some bible reading. I did a lot of surfing, and it was really a nice relaxing day. I was thinking about how fast time goes. I'm 21 years old and i'm yet to accomplish a thing. I have a lot of plans, but I mean i haven't accomplished a thing yet besides putting myself into dept.

If i live to be 80, which I would be more than happy with, I have lived more than 1/4 of my life. It's hard to believe because I feel like I have so many things yet to do, and I also feel that I've experienced so little. With how short life seems to me right now i'm trying to maximize my enjoyment out of it. Whatever "enjoyment" may be, thats what i'm shooting for. Thats another thing, I don't want to waste a lot of time taking joy in one thing because maybe later in my life joy won't come in the same form. I don't know i'm thinking to hard. Its fun to think. If you don't think, what do you do? In the grand scheme of things, there are a lot of things that are over rated. When you're dead you can't take accomplishments from the earth with wherever you're going. So i think i'll try to maximize life through experience and relationships.

Money is important that you kind of need it sometimes. Money is also fairly overrated in that it can take control of things. When money contols me I act stupid.

Sorry this blog doesn't make a lot sense. My brain functions in a fun sort of way. My thoughts were flying and it brought me JOY.
Let go of you heart and head.
Brett Thomas

My Brakes are Failing!

2006-04-24T21:01:00.000-07:00

I have a few interesting things to convey. I bombed a test today but i'm feeling good!

This weekend was interesting. Late last week I started having brake problems. I was loosing brake fluid, and the question was where does the brake fluid go? I'm pretty dumb about that sort of thing, so I called my father. He's smart with that sort of thing. I thought I had solved the problem. So friday night I attended a small get together at my good friend kenny's. It was fun, and I saw a number of interesting and fun people. Apres la soiree, I went to relay for life to hang out in the middle of the night. That was fun, let me tell you. I saw more cool people there. After the night's fun wore off of my I drove home. On my way home I realized my rear brakes were no longer functioning. Luckily I'm a smart and safe driver and managed to get the beast home. Due to my cars breaks not working, i went home the next day so my father could fix. I think the problem is taken care of for the most part.

My "little" brother had prom this weekend so it was nice to see him off for his fun experience. He looked like quite the stud. It runs in our family.

Today I was sitting on the quad in the grass, and i started to itch. I hate that. My hands still have red marks on them from that garbage. It was fun to watch the people though. I also took an essay exam today. My brain was working, but I couldn't get my clear ideas onto the paper.

Its hard to put yourself into classifications. At least its hard for me. What type of person are you? Its different to think about. I'm positive others think of me differently than I think of myself. I can't call myself extroverted or introverted because I'm both. I feel that I keep to myself a lot, and I need to have my own time, but I also think I need the company of others. If I had to choose I'd say intro because I could go for a longer time by myself than in the company of others. Or at least do it more comfortably. This was sparked by an interesting conversation with young woman I know. Thats enough for now.

Have a wonderful time.
Brake fluid,
Brett

Why hello!

2006-04-19T21:12:00.000-07:00

So its uncomfortable in our apartment, like way too hot. It really bothers me. I can't sleep. I'm going to put some ice cubes in my underwear so i can go to sleep tonight.

I'm officially in the grind. I'm strategically skipping classes at the most opportune time. I have two classes that I can miss a maximum of only 2 classes before my letter grade is lowered. This puts a big damper on my skipping frequency. I guess it's for the best, but the last thing I want to do is be in class. I've always prided myself on being able to skip, but still get by. Now they're forcing me to go to class. Excuse me, but i'm paying the money to be educated. I should be able to choose when I want to come to class but whatever.

I apologize to anyone i happen to talk to after I've drank, I seem to make a fool of myself. I'm pretty sure I talked to a few too many people that last time I was in that situation. If I am bothering the poop out of you tell me that I am. Thanks much. Only if I bother though.

I'm going through some new uncharted territories right now. I feel like i'm at some sort of a cross roads in my life. I'm not quite sure, but I feel like something big is about to happen. Maybe I'm imagining things though. I'm not really sure what i'd call my girl situation right now, its not that I'm not interested, but more that i'm unwilling to invest any time into that sort of thing. Being single is the best thing for me right now. I don't really want to explain because I don't really think that I could.

My car is being funny so me being the expert that I am called my dad, and he told me what to do. I think its fixed. The problem is at least determined anyway.

This is fairly scatterbrained. That is what I am. There's a vacancy at the lost and found. With love.

Easter Candy

2006-04-17T19:14:00.000-07:00

Hello to all. I'm doing well thanks for thinking about me. Easter was wonderful, and I got to spend time with some of my favorite people.

Friday I got home fairly late. I hung with the family and had a wonderful time. Saturday I got up early and went shopping with Bethany and my mom. My mom bought me some stuff so that turned out to be wonderful as well. I had to get a new pair of tuxedo pants for my concert attire. After shopping I picked blake up and drove to findlay, we saw brett pitch. He threw it really fast and got shafted because they should have won. Then later I hung out w/ blake, and brett came over later. That was really fun because those are two of my favorite people ever. I love them. Not in a gay way. I finally got to sleep about 2. I woke up at 6 to go to sunrise service at 7 at bethlehem lutheran. It was fantastic and then I ate at church too. I went home and slept for a approximately two hours. I got up and promptly got dressed to go hang w/ the extended family at my aunt and uncles. Wonderful people, everyone was there, and wonderful food. I chilled out yesterday and drove back this morning. Class today was wonderful, and i met some new neighbors that seem very cool. I've been playing a lot of music today as well as eating a lot of easter candy. Thats all. Good Day.

2006-04-14T08:36:00.000-07:00

Yeah so that sore throat i had, it definitely develeped into a somewhat awful cold. Haven't slept much the last couple night, but all in all i'm doing well. Today I'm leaving for home.

Home i'm sure will be busy busy like it always is. I'd like to go home and just relax, but there are always a number of things i have to accomplish when i go home. This makes it difficult to relax because i'm constantly on the move. My family is an on the move type, so i tend to jump back into that when i go home. I'd wouldn't have it any other way though. I'm excited to see everyone, it should be fun.

I played excitebike last night, and I once again dominated. My counterpart continues to improve. haha.

This is real short. But I have little to say, and a clogged up head. Talk to you soon.

Touching me, Touching YOU!

Sweet Caroline

2006-04-12T17:36:00.000-07:00

If you haven't noticed, I'm not good with titles. The title of my blog's many times have something to do with a song I'm either listening to, or one that is fresh in my mind. I like to use outside references, many don't make sense, just like many of the modernist poets references make no sense to me.

Today I feel like absolute crap, unfortunately I had to get up bright and early after a little sleep night to study for a 1 30 exam I had today. I got up at 9, went to millet and promptly cashed out for about an hour. Fortunately I left myself adequate time to study, and I feel confident about my work on the exam.

I checked out some Kerouac I haven't read yet today. This will be on the adgenda for the near future. I like reading about the beat generation. Experiences give you material to write on. I feel that my experiences are the main things I like to think, reflect, and write (if i choose to) on. One of these experiences will make me some money someday. Maybe not. I'd like to think its possible. Jack Kerouac wore sun glasses 24/7. I'm thinking about doing something crazy tonight, haven't determined what. I do have a class in the morning, but i'm living for the present. HAHA. I was invited by my wonderful friend to attend a wonderful music festival. If everything goes smooth, that will be the plan. I'm going to go for now.

I hope all is well. I'll assume it is until I hear from you.

BRETT

Procrastination/Spring is HERE!

2006-04-11T19:37:00.000-07:00

Why hello, I have the worst sore throat ever. Its not like the one i get before i get a head cold either. Its this painful one that started on my right throat now has moved to engulf the whole throatal area. I think I will be able to make i though. I think the hookah i smoked really put me over the sore throat edge, or the cigarettes and magazines.

Today I went to both of my classes unfortunately. They both turned out interesting, but the weather outside made it very difficult. I have a big time essay exam tomorrow. I'm worried in that i don't know what to expect. It will be fine. This is really scatterbrained because I'm talking to wonderful people online. I'll try a stream of conscioussness kind of thing. I can't get over how much fun I had this weekend. Fun is what you make it yeah, but people make fun too. My people are fun let me tell you. Adam burned me a Southeast Engine cd, i've been listening to it a lot. I know i'm going to wear it out on me, but thats ok i'm getting enjoyment out of it. I took a monster nap at like 5 PM to 8 PM tonight. I love taking naps at weird times because it messes with your mind when you wake up.

My religion 204 class is pretty much bible story time. Its like sunday school, and even though i feel as if its somewhat worthless. I really get enjoyment out of sitting there listening to this wacky lady. She's so cool.

Today I was sitting on the quad and i saw someone I knew, so i called them and started describing what they were doing and wearing. They literally walked right past me, and didn't see me. It was my best practical joke i ever played. OH yeah I got wings today w/ mr. jason harmon. They were a delicious waste of money. Wonderful company and a wonderful man.

There's a vacancy at the lost and found,

Brett Thomas

Marlon Brando, Pocahontas, and Me

2006-04-09T16:51:00.000-07:00

If anyone reads I hope this blog finds everyone well. Beautiful weather. How can you not be well?

I'm in this place between the reality of school, and playtime. I just got back from OU with some awesome friends. It's like I know i'm going to have to do some sort a work sometime soon, but I know its not completely necessary. Coming down from the high of being with favorite people is tough as well. I'm sure the time for me to do something productive will come sooner than I hope.

I met frat boy Jon in Columbus, and we rode to OU together. To see and stay with my good friend Adam. I had a great time, and once again the company was so much more than I could ever ask for. Some of the most enjoyable people I could be around. We played Mario Kart literally most of the time. Friday we went to an awesome show, a very cool band - Southeast Engine. I really enjoyed. Saturday we smoked some hookah, and went to a party. Saturday evening kind of runs together a touch, but was a great fun time. I never really thought I would have fun with a frat boy, but jon was a great time. He gave me a new found respect for people on the greek scene. Just kidding. He's alright. Thanks to my great friends. Look forward to seeing you "friends" soon.

I'm going to go now. Maybe do something productive, maybe not. Have a great evening, and talk to ya soon.

I like to Stay up Late.

2006-04-04T21:57:00.000-07:00

I hope everyone is doing well. I'm doing well. I ate 20 wings from Frickers with some good company a short while ago.

So recently I've been exposed to two very cool forms of entertainment. Steven Lynch musical/comedian being one and a version of bridge over troubled water performed by the man in black and I believe fiona apple. The song is very cool, I really loved art and paul singing it, but johnny cash gives the whole song a different type of feel just because of his voice. I wish i had a voice like that, that I could just sing a song and really change the whole feel of the song. Pretty powerful. Steven Lynch is this ridiculous man who is extremely funny and has some very funny songs he performs. Strongly recomend both. I'm singing in university chorus this quarter, for the better or for the worse, but so far it has been enjoyable. I kinda forgot how to sing chorally, and it will be fun to attempt to sing "properly." I always feel like I have a nice set of pipes. I really enjoy performing. I wonder maybe down the road I can be involved in something that involves singing. I'm first tenor and i really miss being able to get together with people that I can just really sing with. Maybe i do, maybe i don't. Once I do get invovled i seem to want to get out of it right away. Thats kind of me though, wishy washy sort of guy. I always seem to be searching for something I really want. I'll find it sooner or later.

Techno is a fun thing as well. Maybe i'll talk more about it later. I love you.

Sincerely scatterbrained,
Brett Thomas

My Eyesights Fading and My Hearings Dim

2006-04-03T16:57:00.000-07:00

Today the weather sucks. If i could murder weather i would. Its ok though, it made me thankful for the past few days.

This weekend was crazy. I saw a lot of cool people, and I met a lot of cool people as well. Friday I went to Quaker Steak with Miss Jenae, to see Kenny on his birthday. Kenny was long gone and not present, so we hung there for a long while with some very cool people i must say. On the way home we stopped and I got my first car bomb ever and it was insane. Saturday was more crazy. I met approx. 40 cool people, and I saw approx. 100 awesome people I already knew. Those numbers are obviously inflated to make me sound cooler than I am, but I did meet and see many cool people at kenny's pad. He's very hospitable, and I had the greatest time. This upcoming weekend will consist of a large amount of fun and a trip to OU.

My lit classes are both awesome. Today they reminded me to live life, and minimize regret. I think its impossible to look back and say I honestly did everything the way I wanted to. You can say you wouldn't change anything, but to say you conducted your life in every way the exact way you would have chosen prior is a crock. Minimal regret is awesome, and loving your life for what it consists of is even better. I'm working on really loving my life and the way I live it. I think i'm doing well.

Peace, Love, Word,

Brett

Funny Little Frog In My Throat

2006-04-01T13:24:00.000-08:00

Hi All, life is good for most every part. My mom woke me up this morning/afternoon, with a question about some clothes she's buying for me. These calls normally frustrate, but since she was buying me something I can't get frustrated! So it was good. I also just got done penn station, and know I am done eating for a week or so. Seriously.

So an 11 seed is getting ready to play a final four game tonight. I can't help but think about how ridiculous it is for any team to complain about a seed they recieved from the tournament committee. If George Mason, an 11 seed, can be underdogs in its first 4 tournament games according to the seedings and win them all it proves how little the seedings really mean. Yeah its a nice incentive to recieve a #1 seed because you deserve it from you did in the regular season, but the bottom line is you still have to beat 6 quality teams to win a championship. George Mason has beat 4 quality teams, just as LSU, UCLA, and Florida have to this point. Thats why college basketball is college basketball, and not the money washed NBA.

Belle & Sebastian kicks it.

If you read this you have a big heart.

Word,

Brett

Saviour of my Universe

2006-03-30T09:30:00.000-08:00

Hey! Things are going better since the last time i wrote, just a bit less stressful.

I attended my religion 204 for the first time today. Its interesting thus far. I don't really know what to make of this crazy looking lady. She knows her bible thats for sure, I don't know if jesus is the savior of her life, but she definitely knows her bible. I find it interesting that the bible up until the time of david was never written down. It was passed down orally. I can't help but think to myself that all that time we relied on word of mouth. I know this is going to come off as me really doubting the validity of the bible which i'm not at all. I'm just throwing something out there thats on my mind. When we rely on word of mouth present day, its not always the most reliable. So many small miscommunications - additions to information, subractions of information. Communication is a difficult thing. When you have a hard copy of something you can return to it and understand word for word what the original intended. I don't know. Rambling mumbo jumbo. I think people can just read the bible and accept it like nothing. Just like in anything it adds a new element when you're analyzing the source. Right it's inspired by and from God, but all men live in sin, and man is who wrote it. I love Jesus, and I'm a christian. This why it is by God's grace we're saved by our FAITH. The wages of sin is death but God's gift is eternal life in Christ Jesus. (Romans 6:23)

Love you! K bye.

Head Throbbing

2006-03-29T15:48:00.000-08:00

Worst Headache in my history of headaches. I didn't have any thing to relieve the pain so i had to perservere through it until after class today when I could buy some ibuprofen. I still feel poopy.

So my schedule has officially changed approximately 12 time in the past two days. Not really, but it seems like it. I think i finally have a workable one figured out. This continual changing has greatly contributed to this massive headache. I'm slowly feeling better. I feel the need for intoxication, but I don't know if that would be the smartest thing. I'm taking two courses with the same teacher - Dr. Lynette Jones. She is strange let me tell you, but I also see her as an awesome teacher. It will be a lot of reading and analyzing, but it will be fun. Literature. Its something I enjoy reading, but would never do it on my own. When I get in a course like these, I like them because I do get enjoyment out of them. I'm also taking a religion course so i can figure out where the heck i'm going. Just kidding, i know where i'm going. This rel 204 should be an interesting spin on the bible though. I job would also be sweet if i could find one. Maybe, maybe not.

Good news. Benjamin Jay isn't out as long as previously thought. Should be 3 months minimum, but SHOULD be able to play football. I was just so happy for him because it was kind of a big deal.

Thanks for reading. Talk to you all soon.

Brett Thomas B.

Start of a Quarter

2006-03-27T20:58:00.000-08:00

So I'm feeling overwhelmed by today's classes and i'm not really sure why. Its not like they're going to be overly hard, at least I hope not, but i'm feeling un easy about them. School sucks. Why can't the learning process be enjoyable and without stress of any kind?

Do you ever get really excited to go to sleep? Sure I mean you have certain things to get done during the course of a day. You have to talk to so many people for a certain amount of time. You have to watch so much TV, or entertain yourself somehow. Theres just a certain things you do during a day. But I mean when its time for you to get around for bed, and you're close to being asleep, it's just a happy time for me. Bed is an outlet for me, a chance for me to get away from this crazy life i'm living. Bed gives me time to not think about anything if i chose, or to think about everything. Either way it's an outlet. Its the first time since I got up that I don't have anyting on my plate that needs accomplished. I have time where I can think about anything and everything. Before I go to sleep I think about anything and those thoughts seem to blend into my dreams. I love the period of time right before sleep where you're not really asleep, but not really awake but you're still capable of thinking. I wish I could write down everything I think of at those times because I feel like those things are actually worthwhile and what people want to hear. Maybe someday I will recall what I was thinking of the night before, and that can become that one song I want to write.

Anyway, that was was weird.

I'm longing for bed right now. Love.

Spring Quarter

2006-03-26T17:59:00.000-08:00

Hi All,

And so spring quarter begins. It feels like ages since winter quarter over, but its only been a week. Winter quarter sounds depressing but spring is fun and exciting, hopefully it will be.

I already have made a ton of plans this quarter, maybe too many. It should be busy and fun, but maybe not the best for school work. Thats fine though school isn't #1 on my priority list anyway. Spring break was awesome, and I'm thankful to have spent it the way I did, with friends and family. I can honestly say i saw all of my very best friends, even if it was just for a bit. I spent two evenings with blake before he jetted - he's cool. I spent a few evenings with adam - he's cool. I spent two with nathan, one at home and one in columbus. With Nathan I went to Ryan's choir concert which was very cool - they're both cool. I went to my long lost friend Brett's baseball game sunday where he picked up the win because he's a sweet pitcher - he's cool too. I hung with my dad and brother at state tournaments and they're both cool as well. Sorry to ramble but I saw a lot of really cool people over my break. I'm blessed to have awesome people in my life who I can identify with and relate to.

I'm looking forward to spring quarter and all the good times and people it will bring. I will post again soon. I love to blog on high speed connections.

Right oh

Break Yeah!

2006-03-22T12:53:00.000-08:00

I have dial-up at home, therefore anything on the internet is not tolerable.

My break is going fabulous. You're probably waiting for me to tell you how wasted I got, or about all these crazy things I've been doing. The great thing is I haven't done anything crazy. I had fun on friday with blake, adam, and nathan in BG. I've gotten a chance to hang out with those guys and really take it easy. I've come to the conclusion that regardless of what situation I'm in, i'll have fun if i'm with my friends. Real friendship doesn't need incentive activities to make something fun.

My brother found out he will be missing 6-9 months of sports because of a fracture and a dead bone in his wrist. Pray for him, the following months will be extremely tough I would imagine. He's basically one of the cooler people that I know.

Wright State is still the wrong college but it appears I will be finishing my bachelors there. I would love t0 attend OU, but financially Wright State is looking fantastic. Plus people at the wrong college are pretty darn cool.

Sorry to be so scattered, but I had a number of things I wanted to touch on. I will try to be more focused. It probably won't happen because I like to jump around.

If you read this I love you. If you don't, I still might.

Quarter End

2006-03-15T21:11:00.000-08:00

I officially have two exams tomorrow and then i'm done with winter quarter 2006 forever. It's a great feeling. The last thing I want to do right now is study but the first thing i need to do is study. I found myself procrastinating this quarter more so than any quarter before. It was fine because I ended up pulling out some decent grades. I went to some basketball games at the Nut house tonight (in my procrastination) and it was great to see high school basketball at its best or worst. Either way it's high school basketball and that's what makes it great.

So I'm single. Me saying i'm single is honestly still a weird thing. I mean I like being single, but its just strange. You commit to a person for so long, and commit to a relationship for so long I guess you just get used to that feeling. Just as it took me a while to get used to being in a relationship I'm sure it will take a while for me to get used to being single. This is after i've been "single" for approximately 4-5 months. I'm sure this sounds pathetic to all, but thats how it is. Girls are a weird species and once again I will have to go about trying to understand them. Jesus can help with that.

I love everyone who reads this. Talk to you soon.

The Little Ants Marching, They All Do It The Same

2006-03-14T17:20:00.000-08:00

Hi all. Uneventful again today. I need to start an online final soon and start studying for two others even sooner, but all that can wait approximately 10 min. I just got back from all you can eat wings, and now i feel as if a boulder has lodged itself in my stomach. It was a good time with good company.

Last night at 2 AM i happened to flip through VH1 and i came across Dave Matthews Band Storytellers. I watched the entire hour long show, and it i really reminded me of some awesome memories. Hearing some of the songs just reminded me of different people, and times that used to be. I've been listening to Dave all day, it tends to grow and fade on my quickly depending on how i'm feeling. I'm glad I came along to show because I was reminded how how much I enjoy the people i experienced it with. I don't know if I really like Dave Matthews Band. I mean I do enjoy it, but I think i more enjoyed the times I had while listening to it.

Can't wait for spring break and the people I will see. I miss my family a ton. Looking forward to seeing everyone sooner than later.

Eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die.

Maybe, maybe Not.

peace and love

Number Two Because it's Fun

2006-03-13T17:30:00.000-08:00

Hi all. I don't know if anyone read my last blog and that is fine and great. I don't even really know if i really want people to read what I'm feeling thinking. If you do happen to read let me know though. Either way, getting my thoughts and feelings down somewhere is good for me and maybe others as well.

To anyone who read the previous blog, I apologize for extreme disorganization of thoughts.

Today I did officially nothing. I slept in, watched TV, and did my own thing all day. It was awesome to have a day where i didn't have something on my plate that I had to worry about. Maybe this exam week will treat me well. It has thus far.

I really want to write a song. I get vague ideas for songs, but I usually stuggle to find the words that convey the vague idea that I start with. Hopefully someday I can find these words and i'll catch up with that vague idea in my mind. Even if I could write one song that somehow effected one person I would be happy. When i do finally write this song, I want it to be a song about myself and something that i'm feeling. Maybe through what i'm feeling someone else could relate. If that person can relate, then I guess you could say that the song was written for someone else as well.

Props to my boy Troy, Theatre Dept. look out.

This was great fun again. I'll do it again soon.

This Is A New Thing

2006-03-12T20:51:00.000-08:00

So I had to start a blog once before, but it was required and it was for a class. This is my first recreational blog, and I've already gotten a ton of enjoyment out of it.

This quarter has been completely crazy. Crazy in that its been completely fun, completely different, and completely stressful. And I'm sure you say yeah, so has mine. But for me to have a period of time like what I've had over the past two months is out of the ordinary. I really think of myself as a boring person who gets into a groove and sticks to that groove. Thats always what I had done and I was fine with that. These last couple months have been different. I have done a lot of thinking recently about a major decision that has to be made soon (transfer). These past month have also been great in that I've met awesome people, spent time with awesome people, and really got to know people that I always wanted to know better. I've experienced new things, some good and some bad. I've gotten away from things as well, some for the best and some for the worst. That being said, the last couple months have been exhausting. I have spring break shortly, which I really need and am looking forward to. I get to see a lot of people that I really love.

I don't know what this blog is accomplishing, but I have a lot of things on my mind and possibly letting others know will relieve some of my life exhaustion. Don't get me wrong, it's good exhaustion, but nevertheless it's exhaustion. I know that I probably am not making sense with the limited information I gave in this blog, but writing it down and allowing others to read makes me feel better personally. I was hoping that people will maybe read this and have half as much respect for this as I have for nathan miguel's blogs.

I apologize for anyone who reads this and feels completely stupified. I had a lot of fun my first time. I'll have to do it again soon.

Mr. Brett Thomas